Fan: Identity Thief
Identity Thief is a fanfiction by BlueSkyfire and ElectricFire 169. Chapter I For the forty-third time that year, Johnny Ghost and Johnny Toast packed up their extermination gear and left the Acachalla's neighborhood. "Why do we always get stuck with these kinds of jobs?" Ghost groaned. "We're paranormal investigators, not pest control!" Driving the Ghostmobile at breakneck speed, Toast peeled his eyes from the road ahead. "Because, sir, I think toxic rats from the Thirteenth Dimension count as paranormal entities." Toast shifted his gaze to the signpost he had just narrowly avoided. "Do you think anyone else could deal with these sorts of problems?" Ghost knew Toast was right, but he hated being wrong, possibly more than he hated unnecessary work. "I just don't understand why the Acachalla's can't deal with their own messes! I swear, we get more calls from Gertrude than all of Europe combined!" Ghost punched the dashboard in frustration, causing the cheap, worn plastic to shatter. Toast laughed as the airbag exploded in his face. "I'm afraid if we arrived any later, they might have tried. Of course, we all know how that goes, don't we sir?" Ghost conceded begrudgingly as the van sped on. He fiddled with the radio to check if anything interesting was on. "...why, you can tell her that I told..." "...was really the most interesting thing about Felix's..." "...but, I hear you ask, how can it be sanitary if it's poop?..." "...in the land of the Siminole..." He kept playing around with it until Toast tapped him on the shoulder to let him know that they had arrived. The van pulled out to a juddering start outside the infamous apartment with a faint squeak. Ghost looked first at his partner, Johnny Toast, and then ahead, thinking of the offending house. How many times they had been called in to investigate things at that location, not including the false alarms. It was more times than Ghost cared to remember, mostly to maintain his ever-precarious grip on his own sanity. What horrors lurked beyond that foreboding door this time? No doubt something so horrifying as to defy any hope of description by methods both conventional and extreme. In their silence the two men shared a single, unspoken understanding about the house, and in particular the family that lived in it. Climbing out of the dingy blue van, the duo seemed oblivious to the crowd of people standing across the street. Slinging their bags across their shoulders, the pair of P.I.E. executives set out to do their work. Glancing through the window of the Acachalla household, Toast saw a fat, bald figure loading a shotgun. "Well... Do you think we should knock?" Toast said jocularly. Ghost gave him an arch look before walking up the drive with his companion following behind, pulling faux-karate moves and looking in every direction for traps of some kind. Ghost shook his head in exasperation as they reached the front door and knocked on the door. Category:Fanfiction Category:Fan Fiction